Ok...as the Mom of five...Mother's Day is always fun..always fullof fun surprises. Paul is an amazing father and he always makes it perfect. Today was the best! Since, I was a little girl I have dreamed of having a little girl that was a ballerina. Her recital was today and she was precious! They did a few steps and it was over in the blink of an eye. I leaned over to Paul and told him "thank you for giving me this opportunity." We had a full row full of family-Dad, Aunt Jan, Rikki, Mark, Annette, Gloria, Patti, Abbey, and Grandma Evelyn from Minneapolis! The best part is that Gracie loves Ballet and is good at it. She enjoys the form and practice and class is the best part of her week. Thank heaven for littel girls!
The kids all gave me beautiful cards. Austin got me this beautiful blown glass figure with Mom and roses on it. Paul and all of the kids got m a new I-Pod Touch. It is my first MP3 player and I think I am going to really like it. I can listen and jam to music while working late at night and not bother anyone. My family is so thoughtful and I enjoy being their Mom.
It's been 6 years since Mom passed away and it seems like it should get easier...it doesn't. There have been so many times in the past year that I wished she was here to vent to..but most of all ..so I could tell her that I finally have evolved into an understanding of what it was like raising three teenagers! I wish so badly that Mom could be here to know Gracie and Chandler. I need her now as we walk down the road of Austin's learning struggles and dealing with a school district that I have had the highest regard for all of my life and now see almost daily the attempts to do anything but provide a Free and Appropriate Public Education that ALL children deserve and are entitled to-even those who aren't perfect. Many mixed and confused emotions still swim around when I think of Mom. I know that she loved me and did the very best she could do with her circumstances. She was a great cheerleader for the three of us. It breaks my heart that she is missing out on my children growing up...especially Logan. When she passed away..so did most all of our family traditions and I have struggled immensly to make sense of it..but for this two weeks in May, as I reflect up what Mother's Day truly means and also on the anniversary of her passing..I can't help but think that death robbed of us of so much. I miss you Mom and I will never forget you or what you stood for.
Anyway ...now I am rambling. More later!
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